| Equilibrium and elephants | |||
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14.8.02 ( 14.8.02 ) Ally Hmmm, what to do, what to do? Yup, it finally happened. They finally put the internal vacancy up for the training position I had been waiting for. Got till Monday to decide whether or not I want to apply for it. I soooo hate dilemmas. See, I know I could do the job, and I know I would probably enjoy it, but I've come to the point of feeling totally degenerated. I have no faith in anything, much less this company's ability to employ the right person for the job. I mean, for crying out loud, I've spent time training team leaders and co-ordinators up in aspects of the job! Jeez, they should know the job if they are in such positions. Shouldn't they? Well, deflated I am. And that's that. Skips, amen, honey. Yep, I know the things you said should be the way I should be going about things, but I can't see the tunnel for the light at the moment. I have this massive huge rejection monster looming over me and at any given second it is ready to give me a good kick in the chops. And I'm not just talking about the male rejection monster, I'm talking about the career monster too. F**k, the career monster is ten times more viscious than the male rejection monster. I can handle that. So much so that I'm not really arsed that I don't have a male to look after. Spot is enough for me, the demanding little feline.... Feed me.... Play.... Give me attention. But, career = better job prospects = better pay. I so hate equations. Anyhoos... off to ponder my future direction, and whether I can be bothered trying to put some more writing in the other blog. #
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